What You Need Might Be Different From What They Need

It’s been a wonderful parenting opportunity to let Merlin heal.

My daughters have to remember that to him, the isolated bathroom is peaceful and lovely. It’s a cat’s dream.

To us, it’s lonely, dark, and terrible. To us, it’s misery.

My daughters want to storm the room and snuggle Merlin. They want to smother him with kisses and pets and treats. They want to compliment him with their high-pitched, sing-song love.

I remind them that what they would like isn’t what he would like. It’s so difficult to consider another’s point of view. We project everything we want and value and need without pausing to inhabit the experience of the person we so desperately want to love and comfort.

 

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