I Didn’t Believe It

Today I made hot buttered popcorn with extra salt. I stirred homemade lemonade.

Then, with lemonade and popcorn in hand, I watched an entire movie with my daughters in the basement. It was Smurfs 2 from Redbox. I laughed! It was cute!

I remember being a new mom 11 years ago. I met an older mother who told me that one day, it wouldn’t be this hard. This task of mothering–the exhausting labor of it–would change. One day, she promised, I’d sit with these babies and we’d enjoy a movie together. Nobody would need a diaper change, a sippy cup, or a nap. Nobody would need me for any physical thing for a whole afternoon.

I didn’t believe it. I couldn’t imagine it! A whole movie? No! Something I’d enjoy too? Really?

And now I’m here.

I’m here, and I sat alone in my kitchen a minute ago. I called out to my perfectly contented children, “Does anyone need mommy for anything?”

“We’re fine!”

Part of my heart wished that someone would need something.

(That thought only lasted a minute, but it was a nice, nostalgic thought!)