My friend shared with me this video that I had seen last year and had forgotten (thank you, Katie!). It’s Dr. Brene Brown’s interview with Oprah on the terror of joy. You must watch it! It will change you! Click here for the video: http://www.oprah.com/own-super-soul-sunday/Dr-Brene-Brown-on-Joy-Its-Terrifying-Video.
What I loved about this video is that Dr. Brown provides an answer to why I live in future fear. It’s what she calls foreboding joy. It’s a way of “dress-rehearsing tragedy so [I] beat vulnerability to the punch.” Dr. Brown talks about how to heal from what another friend, Ceil, called, “all that wasted energy.”
I do know the sheer terror of joy. I was snuggling in bed with both girls last night, laughing and hugging and enjoying them, and I had that moment of terror that I was happier than I had ever been in my whole life. Immediately, I could have chosen fear of losing this, but instead, like Dr. Brown teaches, I softened into the moment of joy and traveled the bright path of gratitude.