Sixteen years ago, I stood outside the arena where our mission’s conference took place. I wasn’t participating. I was too tired, too discouraged, and too disoriented as I pushed a stroller with a crying baby in it. I couldn’t do anything.
I wandered into an area where a group of intercessors met to pray for those who needed it. I practically collapsed into their circle. I didn’t even know what to ask for. I didn’t even know what I needed or who I was or what I was supposed to be doing.
Sometimes, you’re that tired and that discouraged. Maybe that’s you today!
I’ll never forget the older silver-haired woman who leaned my way after praying for me. She clasped her hands together before speaking, and it seemed like something authoritative and real was about to come out of her mouth.
She directed me to 1 Samuel 30.
Samuel? Of all places in scripture! What could I learn about motherhood and being too tired for anything in that book?
She told me about a great battle where David recovers all the wives and children and plunder that the Amalekites stole. Before entering into battle, David and his men had been so discouraged and grieved that they wept until “they had no strength left to weep.” Everyone was “bitter in spirit” but “David found strength in the Lord.”
I’m listening, but I don’t understand how this relates at all to me pushing a baby stroller around while everyone else was doing the great, clear work of the Lord inside the arena.
Then, we get to the part where David takes his men into battle. Two hundred of the men were too exhausted to participate. They stayed back from battle. They just couldn’t work anymore. They just couldn’t do it.
That was me! I’m that tired!
Well, when David and the fighting men return with all the plunder, some of the fighting men complain that those who stayed back to rest shouldn’t have a share in the plunder.
And David says, “No, my brothers, you must not do that with what the Lord has given us. He has protected us and handed over to us the forces that came against us. . . the share of the man who stayed with the supplies is to be the same as that of him who went down to battle. All will share alike.”
The older woman told me that I’m like the one too tired to fight anymore. She said that I shouldn’t worry about all the ministry work of other people right now. “Your work is the resting. Your share is the same as the others. All will share alike in what God is doing–whether you’re in the arena or outside with a baby.”
The work is the resting. All will share alike in what God is doing.
So I pushed my stroller around all summer, resting and sharing in what I didn’t fight for.