I discovered a new coaching question for personal development:
What settings help you feel most like yourself? What is usually happening in those settings? Who is present? What are you doing? What are you talking about?
When the people you’re developing find some common elements of what helps them feel like themselves, you can ask how they can bring those elements into any setting of their lives.
I’ve learned what I need to feel like myself when I’m on stage or in a classroom. I’ve learned what I need to feel like myself when I’m writing, parenting, or relating to people in general. The great news is that these elements keep expanding.
I’m most myself when I’m in the role of encourager, teacher, or learner. In new settings, I love to think about who I might encourage, what wisdom I might pass on, or what I might learn here.
I’m also most myself when I’m able to talk about God’s word, grammar, and stories. I also love to prepare food for people, to tidy spaces, and to help others grow into themselves.
When I don’t feel like myself, it’s usually because I’m taking on a role that doesn’t ring true somehow. I’m performing, not living authentically.
I love to ask questions about the things I do that bring me back to the true me.