Save Yourself Some Pain: Don’t Ever Assume You Know What People Are Thinking

Today I remember how much pain and distress we can save ourselves if we don’t imagine what other people are thinking.

You just cannot know. You aren’t in their minds. If you’re confused or concerned about what someone might or might not be thinking, mature adults simply ask that person what he or she is thinking.

We avoid so much confusion if we just ask.

Many of my conversations with my husband begin with my theorizing what a friend or family member must be thinking. He often tells me, “You don’t know that.” Twice today I misinterpreted what someone was thinking. Twice! (And I’m someone who reads people very well–it’s part of teaching for over a decade.)

Living with flair means we don’t assume we know what people are thinking. Just ask them. This saves much pain, confusion, and distress.

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